The Love Life of: Imogen from Degrassi
Degrassi is a TV show that’s been around in some form for literally longer than I’ve been alive. I only started watching in the 10th season of the current iteration “Degrassi,” previously known as “Degrassi: The Next Generation,” because a friend of mine tweeted a link to the season 11 “Now or Never” promo video: http://vimeo.com/24484326. It remains, in my mind, one of the greatest promos ever created, as it literally got me to start watching a show. Fireworks! A bonfire! A gun! What? I must get in on this! So I immediately cued up the prior season and swan dove in there like a champ.
The Love Life of Imogen Moreno!
Imogen is… adorably weird. Some descriptions call her artsy or quirky, but honestly a lot of her lines are stupid nonsensical jokes that often don’t actually make sense and none of the other characters understand her. She’s like that wacky aunt who constantly makes references that make no sense, and you think it’s because of the age difference and she’s referring to some show you’ve never heard of, but later you find out she’s talking about some show you DO know, but you didn’t understand because she called it the wrong name (i.e. She won’t shut up about her favorite show “Irish Dancing and the Street!” and you find out a year later she’s actually talking about… How I Met Your Mother). That’s Imogen.
Prospect #1: Eli Goldsworthy (Swoon Level: Tumblr Will End You If You Mess With EClare)
So Imogen had the unfortunate job of coming in to the show as the “girl who is obsessed with Eli.” Now really, Imogen was all of us. EVERYONE was obsessed with Eli and his stupid all-black wearing, overdramatic self. But everyone was also obsessed with the relationship of Eli and Clare, or #EClare. And EClare had only recently ended with a flourish and a bang, as only a truly endgame couple could.
So cut to the new season, they are broken up, and Imogen is introduced as a new character!
Eli is (of course) writing a play about his epic love with Clare, which he called “Love Roulette” (proof that Degrassi is really the greatest show in the world, and no one can convince me otherwise), and Imogen wants to be the next Clare play “Clara.” So, she… single white female’s Clare. She starts dressing like her, acting like her (all for the play of course), and later when the play is over, she dates Eli for a hot second.
I’ve already forgotten most of this relationship, but as I recall it ended when:
1. Imogen took photos of Eli without him knowing and secretly used them in a photography project she called “overcoming bipolar disorder.” (this is what is known as an epic bad move)
2. Eli was, very clearly, not yet over Clare (spoiler alert: he will never be over Clare, and he will go to his grave screaming Clare’s name into the night as violins begin to play and a lone trumpet blares the tune to “Elephant Love Medley”).
3. Eli broke into Fiona (Eli and Imogen’s mutual friend, more on HER later)’s apartment because he thought Imogen was cheating on him.
This show is so exhausting and I’m only on Imogen and Eli. I clearly have so much to say about Eli Goldsworthy, so maybe I’ll do a “Love Life of Eli Goldsworthy” in the future. It will just be a list of my favorite things he’s ever done or said.
Prospect #2: Fiona Coyne (Swoon Level: If you set a fanvid to “Brokenhearted” by Karmin I will ship it so hard)
I’ve watched this video four… -teen times… today. Okay fine, I also just really love this song, BUT LOOK HOW CUTE.
It’s your typical girl meets girl, girl becomes friends with girl, girl tries to hide feelings from girl by setting girl up with Eli Goldsworthy, girl plans winter carnival to impress girl, girl might have to move back to NYC, girl kisses girl on ferris wheel… and this structure gets really confusing when they are both girls but <3<3<3
They are like a breath of fresh air after Eli and all his drama! Fiona and Imogen together are the human embodiment of a Carly Rae Jepsen song. Oh sure, let’s get specific here… probably “Picture“, because even though it’s about long distance (I think) and doesn’t totally apply here, it’s my favorite CRJ song and it’s underrated.
And then Fiona moved to Paris and ruined everything. The End.
Was I trying to set this up as a contest? Again, I picked a clear winner and loser here. Eli Goldsworthy will always be perfect, just not for Imogen. They were terrible together. Fiona and Imogen kissed on a FERRIS WHEEL, so they win.
Are any of you (still) watching Degrassi? The correct answer is “yes.”