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Hello Goodbye Rachel Schieffelbein

Description

Mya has a plan. Give the baby up for adoption, finish high school and college, marry Michael, and then have kids. But a pregnancy complication lands Mya at a hospital half a country away from home and changes everything.

She moves in with her aunt and uncle and their kids, including Jane, Mya’s self-absorbed sixteen-year-old cousin. Living in tight quarters, with tense small talk and unspoken judgments, Mya and Jane struggle to find common ground.

Feeling all alone, Mya longs for home and for Michael. But as her baby grows, so does her love for it, and what she’d thought was a clear choice becomes fuzzy. Keeping the baby could mean losing Michael, and Mya isn’t sure she can handle her own life without him much less the life of another.

How can she choose between the boy she loves and the baby their love created?

Length

  • 69783 words
  • About 279 pages
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Swoon Index Ranking

  • Heat

    3

  • Tears

    8

  • Laughs

    7

  • Thrills

    6

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27 comments on "Hello Goodbye"

QueendSheena on June 17, 2017, 2:13 a.m. said:

QueendSheena


I think it's an interesting story. But there are a few things the author can improve.

1. The writing sounds very judgemental towards the characters. Like one is more innocent than the other. The writers opinion should not easily show in the book.

2. Oblivious parents can only be accepted for so long.

3. There are way too many conversations. Too much telling. Everything is said.

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Rachel Schieffelbein on June 18, 2017, 9:48 p.m. said:

Rachel Schieffelbein


Thanks for the feedback! I'm curious as to which girl you thought I favored. Lol. I didn't feel the way I guess it came across.

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Appollonia on May 18, 2017, 10:40 a.m. said:

Appollonia


I really loved the story. I was crying at the end! I'm planning to share it with my sister. She has a toddler herself and is a long-time fan of 'Teen Mom' and 'One Born Every Minute'. I think this book would really speak to her.

I also work in a high school library, and I think lots of the girls in the school would like to read this book if we had it on the shelf.

I honestly liked everything about this book and tore through the whole thing in two days. It's the first eBook I've ever read all the way through, as I usually struggle to read fiction on a screen, but this one kept me reading.

The prose was clean and straightforward and easy to read. The few instances of more figurative language were well incorporated. I liked the short, alternating-viewpoint chapters. They really hooked me in and kept me turning the pages.

I also thought the story was structured well and the emotional arcs of all the characters were convincing. I especially liked the handling of the Harper character. She wasn't just a villain. Her justifications to herself made sense in the context of her background.

My only suggestion would be that maybe the character of Aunt Becky could be a little more fleshed out. Her bonding with Mya when they were watching 'Baby Story' towards the end was touching, but maybe could have been even more so if the reader had a little bit more of an impression of her.

Thanks for a great read! I'll definitely keep an eye out for more manuscripts by this writer in the future.

Similar Stories : I think 'Mean Girls' and 'Juno', as mentioned in the description, are good comparisons.

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Rachel Schieffelbein on May 23, 2017, 9:53 a.m. said:

Rachel Schieffelbein


Thank you so much! This review truly made my day. <3

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Appollonia on May 17, 2017, 1:50 a.m. said:

Appollonia


I'm really enjoying the book so far. I like the crisp, clean prose style and the short chapters with alternating viewpoints. These techniques keep the story flowing along smoothly.

I'm also intrigued by the relationships presented here. Especially Mya's relationship to Michael, and Jane's to Harper. I feel properly tense at how the main characters are trying so hard to manage someone else's desires and emotional responses.

I also like the subtle way you learn something new about each narrator from the other, which illustrates the gap between the way they feel about themselves and the way other people might perceive them. For example, when we learn from Mya that she sees Jane as being 'super polished', it put Jane in an interesting new light for me. Even a little more of this might be good, but maybe it will develop throughout the book.

Looking forward to reading on! Thanks 😊

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Jenny Morris and Hope Roberson on May 12, 2017, 8 p.m. said:

Jenny Morris and Hope Roberson


I'm a sucker for anything that has girl bonding and the cousins relationship was my favorite part. Mya's struggle and final decision about her baby really touched my heart and I admit I was crying by the end. A very sweet book and love and family!

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Rachel Schieffelbein on May 13, 2017, 7:36 p.m. said:

Rachel Schieffelbein


Thank you! πŸ’—πŸ’—πŸ’— I'm so glad you enjoyed it, especially the cousins' relationship.

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Tracy on March 12, 2017, 8:32 p.m. said:

Tracy


It was a little slow at first but after a while I really grew to love this. Nicely developed characters, and fantastic writing. Especially as it progressed. I hope you get published!

"What You Left Behind"

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Rachel Schieffelbein on March 12, 2017, 8:57 p.m. said:

Rachel Schieffelbein


Thank you so much! πŸ’—

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pecksgrl on Feb. 12, 2017, 8:12 p.m. said:

pecksgrl


Loved this! It made me cry and I know I grinned so many times. Such a heartwarming story.

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